SuckyShittyEWW

This is such a shitty week. First of all, Maine people effing suck. For realz, people can marry whoever they want. Don't people realize the gender divide they are making? This is a huge political step back. Look at feminism and women's rights--it's no different really. People, you are actually discriminating against genitalia, because honestly, there is no other difference between heterosexual couples and homosexual couples. Love is love.

For less drastic shittyness...the Yankees won the World Series. Can you say lame? They've won, what, 28 world series now? yeah, lame. Don't worry Phillies, there's always next year. Let's pwn those yanks sorry asses. Also, school pretty much sucks right now. I just got a 68 on my orgo exam. What I'm actually angry about though is that the average was a 72, and there was NO SCALE! wtf. It was probably the hardest test I've ever taken. It was suppose to be an hour exam. Yeah, definitely took me 3 hrs to do and 75% of the class was still taking it when I left. Exam fail. And some dbag got a 98. All I have to say to you, Mr/Mrs Annonymous Crazy Person is get a life. Jeff informed me last night that there is actually a word for people like this in France--geteliffe, which translates into loser. I bet they voted yes on 1.

Alright sorry to the person who got a 98. I didn't mean to go so irritable on you. It's just been one of those weeks. On the brighter side, it snowed today! That made everything seem ok, because that means it's almost ski season. That means no more rollerskiing, lots and lots of bag burgers, Canada, Christmas, and the seasonal pilgrimages to my sacred home--SUGARLOAF. Oh the spiritual liberation from this abyss of work work work, stress, work, freakout, overexhaustion. And the light at the end of the tunnel appears. Thank the Lord.


Let's just look at the gloriousness

Once upon a time, there was a lovely city called Huntsville. Shit goes down there

Now that my midterms are over, I can give you all (nate) the LD on the past 22 days. 22 days sounds like not a lot, but let me tell you, whoa boy, a shit ton happened. a. shit. ton. To make this story really interesting and minimally mentally stimulating (much needed, fo sho), let's make this post a reverse chronological order picture book!

Phillies are in the world series! Again! also, Matt Stairs, an oh so important pinch hitter is my neighbor. nbd
I probably failed my organic chemistry mid term because I did not read this book



I got 32 on my music assignment. 32 out of 100.


I started my bfflz relationship with my new assistant coach, Timtim on a little island better known as Vinal Haven. Less known as little island


Michelle and I became astronauts. Nasa for the win bitches!



Elizabeth got married and we got crunk.

WE LOVE HUNTSVILLE!

must. learn. hoedown. throwdown.

OMG nightmare

Why do odwalla's have so many calories in them? I mean, if I want a smoothie-like drink that is healthy and isn't actually a smoothie, then there had better be some lacking in the calorie department to make up for imposterism. Talk about annoying.

What is also annoying is the week before fall break. And by annoying I mean torture, like jabbing bamboo in your fingernail beds and twisting it over and over and over while simultaneously shining super bright lights in both your eyes kind of torture. My stress level is skyrocketing and it's starting to really negatively affect my sleeping patterns, aka I'm having horrible nightmares. Last night, I had this dream where my friend Erin and I were staying at my camp alone. We were both in my twin bed discussing how much boys suck and how we are going to find wonderful, charming young men when we go abroad. Sometime during this discussion, I fall out of my bed, because it is after all not really suited for two people (unless the two people are me and Michelle. We totally own that twinage). Well, once I hit the floor, I noticed an arm sticking out from under my bed. Instead of having a complete freak out like I would in real life, I became all concerned. I drug out the large, 20ish year old guy that looks like this ginger that I see around campus, and I kept asking him "omg are you ok?" He just looked at me all dazed and confused and didn't say anything, but I kept asking if he was ok. Then as this one sided discussion continued, I looked over on the other side of my bed (which is nonexistent in real life btdubz...there's a wall there) and I saw a cloaked figure sitting in a chair with two green glowing eyes peering out from under the hood. Clearly the scary figure planted this dazed young man under my bed so he could stealthily position himself on the chair without me noticing...even though Erin would probably notice...oh well. Anyway, the cloaked figure stood up and took his hood off, revealing his big-bad-wolf self. Doesn't sound scary, but oh it is. It really is. He then took this young man's head and ripped it off with his teeth. Of course, he was of larger stature so the head didn't come off right away: there was a slow, gradual breaking of skin and veins and esophagus and trachea. Graphic, I know, but after all the autopsies this summer, I obvs wasn't that fazed. After discarding the body on my floor, the wolf was going to eat us next, after spitting out a tooth that came out after the head ripping. I was excited because I assumed he wouldn't eat us after loosing a tooth, I mean that hurts like a mofo, but no, he was still going to eat us. I think I asked him that too...So Erin took an empty glass handle--where it came from? I don't know--and smashed out the rest of his teeth. Of course that didn't stop him, he was still coming after us to rip our heads up too! So I took handle #2 and bashed out his head...except for his mouth, because his broken toothed mouth was still coming after us to eat us. At this point I figured I had time to run to the kitchen to grab a knife and stab him in the heart, assuming that this wasn't one of those special dream monsters that doesn't die normal deaths. Then I woke up in a freak out moment, like I always do after nightmares, realized it wasn't real, then also realized that as soon as I went back to bed I'd just go back to Mr. Wolf. Annoyed, I wiped my face on my pillow, almost dislodging my nose-ring, which hurt like a mofo--like losing a tooth then eating humans. So I decided to just go back to bed. This time I dreamed about pirate things. Not too shabby I'd say. Pirates are sweet.

Check ma stylez yo

http://www.shopstyle.com/users/chelle3262

SNOW ON SUGARLOAF!

SNOWSNOWSNOWSNOWSNOWSNOWSNOWSNOWSNOW

http://www.sugarloaf.com/
(daily photo)

Infiltration!

The swine got me. Worse timing ever. I have to miss the best party of the year--80s of course! which is happening tonight AND I had to miss Michelle's birthday party last night. Instead I lay in my bed 24/7, and I'm only allowed to leave to use the bathroom. Except now that Sam's gone for a bit, I could sneak downstairs and get food. Perhaps... Pretty boring I must say. I can only hang out with my dogs, which is pretty awesome actually. Them, along with a gallon of grapefruit juice, a thermometer, and a roll of toilet paper are my best friends for the next 3-5 days. And since I'm too disfunctional to work/read/do anything mildly mentally straining, all I do is sleep and watch disney movies on youtube. Writing this blog is actually taking a lot of energy and pain, but I'm running out of things to do. So I'm really sorry if this post is incohesive or just wrong, but I must communicate with the outside world somehow. It's pretty sad actually, I mean, if I need to talk to Sam who is the only other person in the house, I either have to text him or call him even if he's in the next room or wait for him to yell at me through the door about taking all the advil. Yeah, sad. I feel like a leper.

GLITTER BONANZA OF JOY!!

MAREN IS COMING! MAREN IS COMING! so the glitter bonanza of joy is tonight, and i'm kindof worried. this party could go either one of two ways. No one could come, and it would be a smattering of awkward people not knowing what to do with themselves and being bored. ORRR it could go the opposite way and there could be 239847648 people, 239847640 of which i dont know. with that situation, there will be no possible way to have my RA NOT know that we're having a party, and if that happens, the RA will no doubt come and that would be awwwwful because the majority of these people (including me...) will be underage. and if that shit happens, which i just have a feeling it will, it goes on your permanent record and Bridget, the girl getting us the stuff, will be taken to court for supplying to minors. which would be HORRIBLE because bridget is the sweetest girl i have ever met in my life. so hopefully dan, the RA, will be out and about and no one will notice. also, i'm worried because there are no activities. no beer pong or anything,... people will be so bored!!!! but i cant think of anything that we could do! i could put on a movie i guess... but it might be too loud to watch it. playing cards? oh god i'm worried. i've never hosted a college party before and for some reason i'm treating it like a martha stewart thing. i cleaned all this morning, and i've had my outfit ready for a week. I'M SUCH A DORRRK!!!! also, we dont have a DD on hand, which is bad because i dont want anyone going home driving drunk, and there is no room for EVERYONE to stay the night!!! ohhhhhh i'm worried.
aside from this, i had a sleep study last night to see why i sleep so much. it suuuuucked. they put twenty million wires all over me and all over my head and TWO not one but TWOOO oxygen things up my nose, and it was awful. i couldnt go to the bathroom without asking some guy that was outside my room, and then i had to lug around 29837 pounds of equipment attached to my body. then he woke me up at 6, which for me is like the middle of the night. also, the glue that they used on my head to keep the wires on smelled HORRIFIC! so i went back to the apartment and took a shower. i probably used half the bottle of shampoo and all that did was dry the glue up even more and make it chip a little so that it looks like i have crazy bad dandruff. fantastic. it still smells too. and all they found was that my carbon dioxide levels were elevated. useless.
BUT the FANTASTICCCC news is that MAREN IS COMING!!!!!!! now we just have to pray that she isnt carrying the swine flu. she says she isnt sick, but her roommates are, so she could just be a carrier and make EVERYONE SICKKK!!! ohhh maren.
eff i'm hungry. okay baiiii.

NEWS REPORT: TAYLOR SWIFT ON REPEAT

Poor Taylor, getting electronic devices ripped out of her hands and whatnot. Honestly Kanye, I'll still marry you, but you need to work on your people skillz.

What a VMAs we had this year. Unfortunately, my roommates and I couldn't figure out how to hook up our cable wire, so I missed all of it. Fortunately, people spend their whole lives on youtube, and this historical douchebag moment was online 2 minutes after it happened, maybe less. Didn't miss a beat, except I didn't catch Lady Gaga's earth-shattering outfit until Michelle posted it. Ballin. Pretty much everyone classy at Bowdoin hates Lady Gaga. Guess I'm not a classy gal. There is, however, the select few of us that attended a party entitled "HOUS OF GAGA CELEBRATION!" There were some pretty good gaga costumes, nothing too stellar, especially on my part, but I'd like to think I rocked it like Miss Gaga would (or should I say miss/mister gaga?). If I make the trek up north this weekend, I'll be sure to go all out--just let me make a wreath out of my own hair and glitter glue, and I'm all set.

Other news-worthy news that could put a damper on this weekend's escapade: SWINE FLU IS TAKING OVER BOWDOIN. Apparently we were featured in the Boston Globe for our campus-wide epidemic. What a great reputation! Omg Bowdoin is such a great school--a wonderful place where the entire student body swaps fluids and forgets to cover their coughs on a regular basis. Or better yet: come get a great education AND get quarantined for a sometimes fatal illness named after an animal that many cultures won't eat. Sounds awesome to me. Personally, I want to get quarantined. I would love nothing more than to be forced to stay in a room by myself all day, where all I'm allowed to do is sleep, watch movies, wear a mask, and never leave (at least until I'm no longer hot. Guess I'll never be leaving. chaching). I also heard that they are feeding quarantine kids lobster dinners. I don't even like lobster, but I would fully soak in the sympathy by contemplating eating it for five minutes or so. I could give it to one of my other swine flu friends as a token of my appreciation for a fellow mask-wearing piggy buddy. I think that's what they should call the quarantine kids now: piggy buddies. I can't wait to be a piggy buddy, as long as it's not this weekend or 3 weekends from now. Perhaps I will pencil swine flu in for the first weekend in november? Then I'll get out of my orchestra dress rehearsal. Perfect. Well I'll go get on that; these things require a bit of strategy you know. Peace

PROCRASTINATE
watch this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Xj8RrIpiiQ

then watch (listen to) this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buAeYUBuieY

Gaga Fever.

So yet again in my music history class, i would like to address the ridiculousness of the VMAs the other night. More specifically, Lady Gaga's blatant amazingness. My roommate Jill hates Gaga, and it breaks my heart. How can you not love someone who came to the VMAs dressed like this...
She is my new idol.
I'm becoming extremely controlling about my party these days. I've decided what rory will be wearing, what i will be wearing, and i'm trying to decide what to get so that when people come to my party NOT wearing something glittery, i can make them wear. i'm thinking cheap plastic glittery top hats. probably get them at iparty or something. and i want glittery temporary tats to put on everyone. makes me cry that mare says she might come and then she cant. breaks my heart. mare. hitchhike. it's safe if you just bring pepper spray and a big knife. hahahhaa. ohhh my life.

Effbomb you school.

so i'm chillin in my music history class. sooo boring. we're listening to corelli's christmas concerto. baaaarf. so rory is throwing me a bday party on the 25th even though my bday is a week later, which is exciting except for the BLATANT flaw that neither maren or natie will be there. which obviously is the formula for the perfect party. it's a glitter party and so everyone has to wear something glittery. which will be fun if i can get anyone to come. i dont have that many friends so it might be a little awkward. SPEAKING of awkward. so i have 5 roommates and one of them, Karen, has the biggest asshole boyfriend in the world. she thinks he's amazing but the truth is, he's probably the antichrist. there's a campus wide movement right now called the "no hate movement" where you sign your name on a banner pledging that you will not discriminate against people of a different race, gender, sexuality, etc etc. someone one day drew a big X on the word "no" on the poster. later, tyler (the asshole boyf of karen) admitted to doing said deed. he says the word faggot constantly, says every racist word known to man, (nigger, chink, kyke, mick, towel head, sand nigger, etc etc.) he gets drunk EVERY night, no joke he's drunk on a wednesday at 6 in the evening. and he brags about driving while he's drunk. basically he is everything bad about the evils in the world. so last Saturday, before going off to see danny and doing an extremely disorganized wedding, i was getting ready, and i hear this disgusting slapping noise and rhythmic pounding noise. turns out, karen and tyler were having extremely EXTREEMELY loud sex. i can never have sex again because it disgusts me now. the other roommates are extremely angry and i'm extremely disturbed. it's horrific. no one knows what to say to her, so we're just kind of staying out of her way.
so there's this new girl in orchestra who's crazy amazing. she's an exchange student from Tokyo and i really want to be her friend, but i'm so awkward that it's weird. it's a friend crush. how do you just become friends with someone? i'm such a nerd and a little kid that i just cant "hang out" with someone. whatever. class is almost over so i'm signing off. love everyone
michelle

I love chicken nuggets

I'm now moved into my new apartment at school. Fortunately, there was only a mild case of traumatization where I realized that I will be flirting with the line between sanity and complete mental chaos for the next 8 months. It is troubling. But as I sit here, listening to my neighbors blast Smash Mouth to my left and drunk girls yell at Linda to my right, I think maybe this won't be so bad after all. Just gotta dust off the old thinking cap, remember my social skills, and numb my body with happy thoughts of bunnies and rainbows while I shut myself in the pain locker that is skiing each day. Tis easy. Much easier than assembling shelves to go above our toilet. How many people does it take to assemble a shitty ass, ugly, cannot stand on it's own, little shelf to make a female's bathroom routine a little easier? The answer, my friends, is 4. One guy that knows how to screw, one Beverly-Hills resident, one covert commander that sits around making sexual puns about screws, nails, wood, and "the back", and one blonde. You also need approximately 2 hours and a lot of sanity. And there it goes! So much for hanging out on the line--I guess I'll just dive into the deep end of insanity. At least now I have an accesible place for the necessities of life: retainers and contacts. I'm a dork, what can I say? They do fit nicely right above our beautiful toilet.

So here it is, a brand spankin new school year. And I would like the answer the burning question of the week with another question
"So Maren, are you ready for school?"
oh yeah? I'd like to know...
"So Bowdoin, are you ready for me?"

If you feel like participating in the new poll, which actually has some sort of purpose this time, and you wish to research a bit, here is a link-->Pandora
and here is a pic
Sick huh? I thought so too.

JEEEZZZZ

So my mother has decided to also get on my ass about blogging. She's currently off to make me a blueberry marg, courtesy of marens mam. She's also going to give me a back rub. ps, mare, it's indie. fyi. and they would be offended by anything because that's just what they do. they act offended and like you're a stupid piece of trash because you're not a vegan. I'm going to freak my shit. my mother is trying to tell me what to write in the blog. what. a. whore. i'm puzzled as to how short summer seems and how long everything else seems. i'm so effing unhappy about school starting and my not being able to see my marebear for another 3948573802 years. instead of counting down the days til school, i'll count down the days until i can see mare again. what the hell was that naan i had last night!!!??? it was un.be.lievable. i could eat it every day of my fricken life. it was naan, but it had nuts, and coconut, and sweet spices, and it was the best thing i've ever had in my mouth ever. even though cosmo says that you should pretend that a guys penis is the best thing you've ever had in your mouth, i say that no one at cosmo has ever had this bread. i ate dog/cat food for dinner tonight... that was disgusting. and i'm off to clean rosie's ears. ps. everyone should read THIS.
good god i love life.

Since Michelle is being lazy...

Now comes the week that we ready ourselves for year 2/3 of college. And I feel like I'm the only person without a fb status counting down the days until I move in. Like, YAY. I can't wait to throw myself back into the sleepless study abyss where I'm surrounded by alcoholics from Boston that still manage to be smarter than me! Ok, I admit I'm being a little cynical and bitchy, but I do enjoy sleeping for 12 hrs every night and only having to answer to my dogs. Except after watching Walle last night, I feel like I should be in a constant state of motion or else I'll become a boneless fatty that eats out of a cup. Perhaps I'll pace around my kitchen table while I write this. Perhaps I'm being such a debby downer because Kevin left yesterday, which means summer is pretty much over. Let's lighten the mood shall we?

Dan and I designed our house yesterday. So. We are going to have a house with a wrap around porch, and our house is going to be covering a giant indoor pool--and that's it. All the rooms in the house will be little islands floating in the pool, so you have to swim from room to room, or kayak or canoe or float, whatever your pleasure. Also, there will be a moat surrounding the house in which our guest houses will float. yes we will be able to afford it! geesh, have a little faith. of course Michelle wants a big guest house, and that's what she'll get. At the moment we only have two others in mind: one for Nikolai and Nora, the other for Sam and Kevin. Pretty sweet huh? If you want in, well that's just too bad.

Also, somebody hayed our field a few weeks ago, and the hay bales are still here! yeeee! they look like giant after dinner mints or giant mini marshmallows. Not giant regular marshmallows for the proportions are totally different. I love it when my backyard is adorned with giant mini marshmallows

The folk festival is this weekend! That means lots of binging on fried food and indian food--the best--and hippies dancing to reggae music. Always a local favorite. I'll have to break out my indie/hippy attire from storage. Question: do indie kids prefer indie or indy spelling-wise? I don't want to offend anyone. Unfortunately, I lost my kickass fake ray bans, so I'll just have to rock the aviators. They go with my nose piercing better anyway, but it will take away from the indie vibe.

Well that's all for now. I did skip a lot of the highlights from the month of august, but when the time is right, I'll break them out again. I think I'm going to the bank right now, then I'll go get some weekend jeans and newton faulkner.

Dear Michelle,

Michelle, update this NOW! or I fork you





<3

it all good

In the words of Shawn Mullins, everything is gonna be alright. Rockabye.
why? you might ask. what was wrong to begin with?

well, ...

Dress shopping done!
Shoe shopping (basically) done!
Aliza and I are leaving for Alabama tomorrow for some hushpuppies, humidity, and a whole lot of southern class.
Today is my last day of work. That means no more autopsies ever. No more waking up super early, and no more dealing with shitty rush-hour/dumbass tourist traffic between the hours of 7-8 and 4:30-5:30. No more tissue dumping! No more close toed shoes! the list goes on and on and on...
I have bangs! And Michelle is getting them too. We're, like, bang sisters. Sisters in the bang
Newton Faulkner (look him up) is making me smile
Kevin's 18th birthday is on Friday.

and last but certainly not least...
NATE IS COMING HOME THIS WEEKEND!!!!! woooooooooooooooo and you know what that means----> family portraits. omg life is so good
*thumbs up*

you are most likely a douchebag vampire wannabe boner

Last night I had the house to myself. Most people are totally ok with being home alone, but due to recent events that have incited terror, paranoia, and crazy freak out moments, I was not ok with it. Thanks to all my wonderful friends that DON'T PICK UP THEIR PHONES, I was stuck alone in a big house, in some big woods, in the big middle of nowhere, without any big dogs or big sticks to protect myself. Fish suggested I get a big stick from the woods and sleep with it. Well, the forest is the perfect place for sketchy people to commit homicide. I could have slept with my ski poles, but that would involve going into the garage where there are lots of powertools and sharp objects--again, another sketchy sketchy place where sketchy things could happen. So instead, I decided to fend off creeps with some loud music and southpark. Luckily, the vampire episode was on, which not only brightened my spirits, but also awakened my inner vampire so that I may easily destroy and devour any strange people that might crawl in through my windows. Needless to say, I made it through the night sans sleeping pills and big sticks. Mission accomplished.

Yesterday was just an achievement filled day. Dan also learned how to rollerski. He didn't fall once! and he made it down some extreme hills with minimal tweeking. We did almost get hit by a car once or twice, but we succeeded in surviving, so we can live for another day and for another adventure. When we were going along Skyline Rd, three boys on motor scooters passed us. I got a couple of creepy looks, probably because I wasn't wearing a shirt. In that moment, I contemplated a few things. Why didn't I put a shirt on? Why are motor scooters so dorky? Is rollerskiing dorkier? Am I going to kill Dan with this rollerskiing nonsense? Would he mind dying in a dorky fashion?
Such ponderous questions, questions that I can now answer. Well, I don't like wearing clothes and yes, rollerskiing is dorky, but it is an essential part of human life. Without rollerskiing, I would not have a sportsbra tan, drivers would not have to use their imagination to figure out what rollerskiing is exactly, the golden retrievers in my neighbor's yard would have nothing to bark at, the slug population would sky-rocket, and all road dorkiness would belong to motor scooters--and nobody wants that. So now that we know the necessity of rollersking in life, I'll give you lessons for $10 an hour. $12 an hour if I go shirtless. Afterall, being semi-naked is dangerous--I could get the melanoma or get hit on by motor scooter-ers.

I showed up early to my research class.

so i'm sitting here waiting for the teacher and all the rest of the students to show up, about to pass out because i'm so tired. my moms old boss is in PEI and she said i could chill at her place while she's gone, so I'M LIVING IN BANGOR!! for a couple weeks. i have my own house and i'll be lonely, so people must visit me. coughcoughmarencough. i need subjects for my research project, i threw out the musician idea, so they dont need to be musicians... they can be, but it's not a necessity any longah. i wonder if people with maine accents write in accents. like, if you see an R at the end of that word, why would you not just say it???? or like, if you're reading the word "augusta" it's pretty much obvious that there isnt an "r" at the end. So why say "auguster"???? makes NO sense to me. ahaha the teacher just showed and it's only me and two other girls. usually there are like, twenty. guess people are getting sick of this shit. i know i am. OH one more person just walked in. that's good. more pics of nate.

This is not important

Just so you know, this blog "follows" my nordic team's blog--Bowdoin Nordic. I am one of 4 people on the team that has a blog, except the other three are/were in cool countries doing cool things or are just doing cool things. Our blog is the only blog that doesn't get a little link on the side of the team's blog. Moral of the story is that we need to be cooler. I guess we'll just have to put up more pictures of nate.


This is important

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

NATE IS WINNING THE POLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!

so, my natie babie is winning the poll. holla. i have been a horrible, horrible person about updating. i'd have a good excuse such as, "i'm in a beautiful house on the ocean with no internet access", buuuuutttt, i'm not maren and my excuse is that i'm just lazy.
OKAY. here's my top five of people i want to do.

NUMBER ONE

NUMBER TWO

NUMBER THREE

NUMBER FOUR


NUMBER FIVE

Love... Michelle.

you crazy

The poll is tied right now! vote now bitches because your vote could change the world.

ps please note that nick jonas has a whopping zippo votes. way to go people

Other exciting daily news: Harry Potter came out today at 12am. Unfortunately, a vast multitude of Harry Potter infatuated crazy people bought all the tickets before Alex and I could, so last night we were stuck watching the Hangover with about 5 other Harry Potter rejects. When we walked in the movie theater though, I was so disappointed. Not one person was dressed up. None. If I had not been lazy and gotten tickets earlier, I would've dressed the fuck out of harry potter. I haven't even read the books for goodness sakes, and I was totally ready to go all out. My grand scheme was to wear a cardboard box painted like the book--poorly of course because I'm artistically challenged--so I'd actually be the book. Then I could hide a pizza in the box. or a pie. Whatever is round and kinda 2dimensional. Plan B was to dress up like an owl, just because they're pretty cool, except there would be no food hiding, so that was slightly lame. But neither plan worked because we're lazy and people are crazy.

Crazy: when we got to the movie theater at 9:50 *PLEASE NOTE that's 2 hrs 10 min before 12* for our movie, and there was already a line wrapping around the lobby just to get good seats for Harry Potter. I mean, everybody in the theater can see the screen from anywhere in the theater. Does it really matter where you sit? Seriously people. You already took our tickets and now you're just playing lobby blood clot and taking our space (stolen from Lydia). AND you didn't dress up. You my friends, were the failure of the night. And we were not the only people frustrated by you, the people working there were going insane. when we told the ticket lady that we weren't going to harry potter and we just needed to get through the vast multitude, she responded "God bless you."
I suppose Alex and I could have dressed up anyway and gone to the hangover, but again, that would take a lot of effort and explaining and I would have to buy a pizza, and we had already binged out on Indian food. Perhaps we can just dress up for some other showing a month from now.

And the fails continued. I forgot my contacts, so I had to drive home at 1am to get contacts so I could go to work in the morning. To add to that, I woke up late for work, missing glorious tumor board. So now I'm at work with a gap between my teeth (forgot my retainers too), terrible hair, make-up still on from last night, giant smell, and no sleep. great. FAIL

A much needed but boring as hell update

Today it is sunny. This is the first time I've seen the sun in probably a decade. At least it feels like a decade. I'm paler than usual, which makes me albino, or a vampire, and it's terrible because it is summer after all. So at the moment, I'm trying not to be albino by not doing my job and sitting outside updating the blog. I'm helping out at Arthur Russell this week though. No parts of people this week. No no, I get the whole person this week-- inability to count, disfunctional ears and all. At this very moment, I'm highly frustrated if you couldn't tell, but I'll try not to unleash any of it on you, it won't do either of us any good. There's just this one wee little child that cannot count, cannot read music, and cannot stop talking about genghis khan and whatnot. highly annoying. Let's not talk about aggrivating things though. Let's talk about the blessing that is Cha Cha. I'm not going to explain what this is to you, I'll just give you this phone number and you can be surprised or just not do anything--EVERYONE WINS! ok so call this: 1.800.224.2242.
I decided that I want to work for cha cha. Apparently they're not hiring at the moment (we inquired about this via cha cha) but I'm hoping in the next week or so they will be hiring, so I can work while I'm at work. mucho moola. ballin. so don't apply to work for them, because I will be severely angry if you take my job. ok, now I can tell you something that you might actually care about. There are ghosts in kevin's house, and quite possibly mine too. They talked to his mom while she was cleaning the other day, and now I'm just freaked out of my mind. I think I will tell you more about this later, when I have internet access again, but I have to go get pizza now. Until then, look out for dead people, particularly the transparent kind. peace out

Michelle and Nan find a spider.

Is it bad that i'm having my ex boyfriend write a reaction paper for me because im too lazy to do it myself???? yes. it's bad. okay. first day of my week intensive music therapy for special needs children course and my brain is already fried. not only do we have bagillion hour days, but he assigned us 6 articles to read, and 2 reaction papers to write. and one of the reaction papers was on a website that he also assigned. so i'm counting that as the 7th article. the upside of all this is that i thought it was a 5 day course, when it is actually a 4 DAY COURSE!!!!! but i didnt quite understand the extent of the homework we had to do. which sucks. so mom and i were taking a walk outside the other day with kipper tagging along behind us and all of a sudden kipper took off. we looked down and there was a little spider with a GIANT egg sack coming out of her ass. no wonder kippy was scared shitless. so mom made me run and grab her camera and she took numerous pics of it and then we went online and looked it up. turns out, it's a common field spider thing, but of course mother was convinced it was a brown recluse. what i didnt know about brown reclusesss (the plural of that weirds me out. it's like, it should be brown recli) anywhoooo, what i didnt know about brown recli is that they are also known as the violin spider, or the fiddleback spider or the brown fiddler. and i was like, hmm.. i wonder why... WELL.. this is why...
See the violin on it's back? while google imaging that i also found THE MOST disgusting pictures of brown recluse bites ever. i wanted to vomit. i wanted to share, but i didnt know how weak your stomachs were. so if you arent faint of heart, google image that shit. it's NAAAAASTY. tomorrow i will update with my list of men i think are fuckworthy.Tonight i have to crack the whip over an ex with my reaction paper to write.

Life is too short to be spent dress shopping

I had a sans internet and excitement weekend, but a blog post is pretty overdue. A couple terrible things did happen. Saturday I did this extremely difficult workout that I've been dreading for months (ok it wasn't that difficult but still...) So I took my poles and my waterbottle belt and placed them under a bush at the top of this butt-kicking hill in an upperclass neighborhood in the middle of nowhere, as to prevent stealage. well, that obviously didn't work, because when I returned from warming up, everything was GONE. After a mild meltdown, I proceeded to do my workout without poles and water, so it was that much more terrible. I had to pretend I had poles, so I looked like a complete idiot. Humiliation: the cherry on top of a "people are bitches" sundae. So if any readers (even though Nate is the only one) took my shit, give it back, or I'll sick Cody on you. Or if you see any strangers sporting some ski poles from the 80s and a beautiful, red Solomon waterbottle holder that resembles a fannypack, come to my house, take cody, and sick him on that bastard.
The only other terrible thing is that my mattress at my camp is so effing hard, hard as a.....ok I won't finish that simile. use your imagination. So it takes me forever to fall sleep on it, compounded with my incessant fear of the ghosts that live upstairs. Seriously paranoia, get out of my LIFE. And when I do sleep, I dream about dress shopping. NIGHTMARE. This crazy dress shopping is finally getting under my skin. Why? WHY? why can't a non white, non black, cocktail, short yet leg-spreadable, clavacle region displaying dress just fall out of the sky and hang itself up in my closet, because lord knows I won't hang it up. This is just too complicated. Honestly, this is so much harder than college shopping and cello shopping combined. ok maybe not cello shopping, but still. I would really appreciate a personal assistant or a stacey-clinton-like-duo to just go find one for me. Life is too short to be spent dress shopping. ug. ok, I'm going to online shop since there is nothing better to do at work. kbye

sassafrassssss

I HAVE NOTHING TO WRIIIIIIIITE!!!!! AND THE BACKROUND IS BLUE AND MY WRITING IS BLUEEEE!!!!! BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP! i miss nate. crying crying crying.

Sam and Nick Jonas

That is all.

sleep time

im kinda scared of sleeping at night now. daytimes okay but at night i have weird dreams about spalunking in caves that are too small and i wake up with the biggest feeling of claustrophobia. i need to find someone who reads dreams. probz not too hard seeing as i live with a hippie. i wonder how mad mom would be if i brought another dog home... i found an adorable brindle plott hound named tango. his owner has dementia and was taken away to a nursing home and cant take care of tango anymore. mom said 3 dogs and 4 cats is enough. i disagree. i think it should be even. ps. still need to get that phlebotomy chair home. mare give me your car. the end.

eeeeffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff.

just watched flight of the conchords nonsense for a while. that was amusing. sittin on the couch snugglin with kipper. putting my foot on his head and he doesnt even care. i started watching the show true blood and am highly, highly disappointed in it. it's like, just because it's on hbo they HAVE to use the word "fuck" or talk about "pussies" every 5 seconds. it's really just trashy. lo siento to anyone who enjoys it. i was lonely and bored yesterday, as always, so i decided to drive 20 minutes to the nearest dunkin donuts. when i got there at 4 OCLOCK IN THE FRIGGIN AFTERNOON they were out of donuts. seriously searsport???? seriously. wtf. anywaaaaaaaaaay it's connected to a gas station so i got oreos and found juno on dvd for 5 bucks. totes psyched. then my mother came back from provincetown and decided to annoy the shit out of me. i was considering matricide but went to sleep instead. that's all i do these days is sleep. sunday i literally slept until 8pm. having fallen asleep at 11pm the night before. i have a class starting next week. music therapy for children with special needs. it is a 5 day class, it starts at 8 in the morning and ends at 6 in the evening. i wont be getting my regular 21 hours of sleep. this is a problem. i'm so lonely and bored but i think that if anyone called and was like "MICHELLE LETS GO DO SOMETHING!!!!" i would be like, "SHUT THE HELL UP NO ONE ASKED YOU" good god i need to be doing something. maybe i'll start knitting again. i havent made anything in a while. THATS WHAT I'LL DO I'LL KNIT!!!!!!!!!! or finish the quilt i was making for adam. and give it to someone else. mare, you want a quilt that has mario on it? but that takes effort. and i just want to nap. i should shower. havent showered since friday. my life is disgusting. i'm not normally this disgusting, i swear to god. i just got a call asking if i could explain the stats i ran on some data. i'm like, seriously? i wrote it in a very simple way. why cant people understand statistics. idiots. i guess that's what i'll be doing today. i'll be rewriting the data in a way that 5 year olds can understand. big bar graphs and maybe a cartoon doggie telling them what the bar graphs say. okay. serious shower time. right now. love you mare.
michelle.

Come on people

I just saw a suburban with huge yellow letter stickers on the back saying, "Don't tailgate. Your made of plastic." Ok people, if you're going to be offensive to strangers, at least be grammatically correct. Then you won't sound like a dumb ass and a jackass. Thanks.

I don't feel like editing this, so don't judge

So here is the scoop I promised. This won't be very interesting, so I apologize in advance. Perhaps I'll give the option of an alternate ending to spice things up a bit. Yeah I think I will...ok well we got into DC around 9:30. The taxi driver that picked us up was major sketch. He kept talking in his middle eastern accent that I couldn't understand. The gist I got was that I was a flower, and daughters are so much better than sons. Fortunately the one sided convo didn't end up where I was preparing for it to go, and we finally made it to watergate. finally. at 10. when we promptly had dinner. What is it about cities and eating so freaking late. A buffalo burger at 11pm just doesn't sit well. I also love that all the Georgetown shops are also still open until midnight. Come on Bangor, you're a hip Maine city, why can't you keep your dollar stores open until at least 10. So the next day was filled with shopping, glorious shopping. While my Uncle David dragged Sam from ritzy retailer to ritzy retailer looking for the perfect hugo boss-esque sports coat, the lovely Tanu, friend de Bowdoin, and I suffered from sticker shock and wallowed in our poor-college-student lifestyles by stuffing our faces with the most delicious pizza on the eastern seaboard. Approx 30 min later, we went for a run in the 90 degree heat and 100% humidity. Yeah, Bangor was looking pretty good right about then. First shirtless run of the summer though! woot! yay for flaunting my not-so-ready-to-be-exposed 2pack abs (I think I use too many multiple word adjectives. sorry, I'll try to control it). Anyway, we barely survived. After the glorious run, sam, my uncle, and I went to Start Trek. O . M . G. so good. I have never, ever watched an episode of Star Trek, but this movie made me so happy. so good. soo good. Michelle, let's buy it and watch it together please.
Again, we had dinner at 10 that night. I don't think I'll ever get over that. Sunday morning was super cool. We went to a flea market. YEE! On the metro there were two little asian girls posing for pictures the whole way. what is it with these crazy asians. I love them so much. At the flea market, we met a guy from Boothbay harbor. We talked about Maine things, and he showed me their Moxie and lobster t-shirts. It made me happy, even though eating lobster is cruel and moxie tastes like butt. I ended up with a sweet dress with gargantuous-slutty slits (holla) and elephant bag from Thailand. There was a vendor on the street with half a dozen gorgeous black lab puppies. I WANTED ONE SO BAD! they looked so miserable, and I just wanted to take them all home and love them and love them some more. They were right outside the little cafe we had drinks at, which had a bubble machine going. Such a scene: sunny quintissential DC, a bustling flee market, bubbles flying through the air, a saxophonist, and puppies. perfect. But all good things come to an end, and it was time to take Sam to his global leadership thing. more foreigners! I hope he brings home some Italian girl with a good looking older brother. Then we can go skiing in Europe. huzzah. After that, it was just a plane-ride, and I was returned to my dearest michelle and puppies. The only other exciting thing on the plane (other than sombrero man) was this cute little girl that kept bringing me this sticker from women's tights. she loved that sticker, and she loved giving it to me then taking it away. children are so strange.
so now I'm home. I was going to provide an alternate ending, but that would just make this way too long, and I'm lazy. So instead, I'll just leave you a pic of my cousin's new dog, Butters. Possibly the cutest thing on the planet at the moment.
What the hell, I throw in a baby penguin too


Weren't expecting that one were you. Just keeping you on your toes
much love
-Maren

So tired

I just got home from DC! I guess I should have loads to unload in typed verbal vomit, but I'm so tired that it'll just have to wait until tomorrow for when I'm bored to tears at work. I just want to mention briefly that my last flight was the most interesting flight I've been on in a while. Pretty much any flight into BIA is bound to have some characters on it I suppose. As a side note, all bangor flights are sent out of the small dumbass terminals with no food, shops, good looking people, or people that you don't know if they're talking on headsets or to themselves. So dumb. But yes, there was an asian wearing a hugeass sombrero with a mickey mouse stuffed animal attached to his backpack on the flight, and yes he wore the sombrero all the way from Philly to Bangor. I LOVE YOU BANGOR!

Penguins?

OH, and mare? that's the best you can do for cute pics of penguins? please. you amatuer.

ALL ALOOOONEE!!!!

So the other day, I found a dress that would be PERFECT for our photoshoot for mare and i, but obviously with my luck, they had mare's size and not mine. damn. I'm listening to She & Him, and it's creepy how much zooey deschanel looks like Katy perry. the only difference i can see is that katy wears uni's way too much. have you ever worn those things? i have one and it's like, HOW DO I PEE???? it's impossible! so today i'm going to chill with lindsay, and tomorrow doin sunshine service w/ lizer. if i can wake up.
so nate is a douche who decided to leave us for 6 WHOLE WEEKS!!!! idiot. and maren took sam to go to dc i guess for the weekend. idiot. and now all i have is frickin ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIZAAAAAAAAA BLLLLLLAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!! hahahhaha. i luv that gurl. OMG SHITSHITSHITSHITHSITSHITSHIT! i just forgot tomorrow is fathers day. guess what i didnt do???? oh crap. and i cant go shopping with lindz for it cuz her dad's a deadbeat idiot craphead who sleeps with his students!!!! oh well. i'll do a big fathers day birthday present cuz his birthday is soon. watched sense and sensibility last night. and i really dont think that Marianne even deserves the Colonel. she's a brat. and coincidentally, the character i relate most with. i wish i could be more like elinor. elinor doesnt unload all her problems on anyone ever. some chick decides they're bffs even though she's "secretly engaged" to the love of elinor's life, and elinor doesnt say ANYTHING!!! SHE CONGRATULATES EDWARD WHEN HE SUPPOSEDLY GET MARRIED!!!!!!! but she keeps her pride. which marianne knows nothing about. marianne gets passed over for some girl with more money, and she wanders in the rain reciting shakespeare until she gets so sick she almost dies. the highlight of the movie last night was hugh laurie playing mr. palmer and making snide comments about his wife. it was also odd seeing emma thompson playing a younger girl alongside kate winslet. alan rickman was older-man-sexy with his deep voice as always. and hugh grant makes me want to giggle just because. and willoughby is a douchebag as always. and now i'm mixing up my actors and my characters. whatever. must feed the doggies now. awaiting mare's return most anxiously!!!!
meeechelle.

Baby penguins. F@$*ing right

A 5 hour panic attack occurred last night. Michelle was suppose to be at my house at 4:45. Around 8:30 I started getting worried. Nate, Aliza, and myself were calling each other incessantly, trying to find 50 different phone numbers to people that would know where she was. Her mom didn't know, her ex didn't know, her best friends didn't know, I'm pretty sure she didn't know. After roughly 30 missed calls to michelle, 2 to her house (we were trying ok...), and a handful more to her worried mother, we figured out that she had fallen asleep at her house right as she was heading back to bangor. it was 10:00 when we figured this out. all I have to say is: GIANT FAIL

So other than that not much is going on. I'll be flying out to DC tonight with Samuel and I finished the twilight saga. Life's moderately good I'd say. I also determined what I want to do with my life--hang out with jeff/the south pole. Jeff Grim if my bffl from MDIBL that I cut up fish with for a summer. He's in Antarctica right now doing some more fish work, and I have to say that I would so much rather be there cutting up fish than here cutting up humans. check out his blog--http://jggoestoantarctica.wordpress.com/. it's possibly 4x better than our blog because there are pictures of baby penguins on it (and for that reason only). Baby penguins are effing great. Which reminds me of this stand-up show on comedy central I was watching on tv while at my hotel for the Dartmouth Carnival this winter. I don't remember what the guy's name was, but he had this ballin joke. He was saying something like,"I want a corvette and a penguin. What's better than having a corvette? Passenger seat penguin." It went on, but that was the gist of it. obvs it was much funnier when he said it than when I type it, but it was effing hilarious. I vaguely remember peeing myself. Not exactly a great pre-race ritual--listening to trashy stand-up, but thats probs why I get my ass kicked. I do dumb s#%$ like that all the time. then again, I would rather wet myself to penguin jokes than have a stick up my ass--no offense dartmouth. only joking. no but seriously, if you need help removing those, I work with people trained to do that kind of thing.

Well I guess if our blog is going to be competitive in this cut-throat blogging world, we'd better get some baby penguin pics on this mofo.



F@$*ing right

ohhh life.

i am at the child welfare conference. WOOOHOO!!! Telling people where to go and shit. running errands. all i want to do in the world is sleep. the keynote speaker is kinda a douchebag. I SWEEPIE WIFF MAWEN TONIIIGHTTT!!! also excited about tonights secret photoshoot. mom is currently giving rides on her scooter on which i put the american flag bike bell. so many lesbians on a scooter. im buds with the chief of police in bangor and hes here beein a creeper. i call him ronnie. and hes like "its chief ron gastia". whatever ronnie.

sweet, sweet daily life

June 17, 2009 in bullet form because it's late and I want to go to bed right. now. but today was moderately to somewhat highly eventful, so it calls for an update

-it was 85ish degrees outside. nice.
-I almost fainted at work today. oh but I wasn't doing anything gross or exciting. no I was just standing in a room, then I wasn't standing anymore. needless to say, I have never been "ridiculously close to fainting" before in my life. pretty scary
-this is how you spell isosceles: isosceles
-I went for a run with my fiancee to dairy queen, and we saw my favorite highschool english teacher walking home from the grocery store, whom nate had seen at the grocery store earlier today. he yelled at me after we had passed him. oh mr. emerson, thou art a great human being
-my horoscope (and dan's) according to coffeenews was something along the lines of "you are exceptional magnetic and sexual this week. go make some sweet sweet love" or something like that. great
-tomorrow, a great, wonderful, fantastically hilarious event is going down, to which there will be evidence on this blog in the near future. just wait for it. even though michelle is the only one who actually reads my posts ahaha. oh and nate, but you're in on it too

alright
I'm peacing out
-maren

boringboringboring.

I cant find my FRICKIN camera. probably should find that. i want a curling iron. i've finished entering the data for the center on aging, and now i have to do the statistics on it. and create a brochure. which i'm not pleased about because i actually have to be creative on the brochure. i like stats though. entering shit in formulas and just pumping it out. it's soothing. what else is new in my life? the child welfare conference is tomorrow. topic this year is "hot topics in child welfare". the keynote speaker, according to my mother looks like, "bob faggot- you know, the guy that did americas funniest home videos!".... i was like, "you mean bob saggat??" "oh yeah. him." great mom. also, i am still in mourning for the worlds most wonderful bathing suit. god i hate boobies. i'm reading the side of a bag of pepperidge farm goldfish, and it shows a pic of "gilbert the pretzel fish" and his quote is "that's okay, you go first" and his achievements are: vice-president "avoid the vacuum cleaner" club, hall monitor, mock U.N.-switzerland delagate. um..... what the eff? wow today is extra boring at work day. mum and kate are going away for the weekend, so i have the house to myself if peeps want to come down and chill in stockton springs. except my room is undergoing some revision, so it's apparently off limits. plus the last person to sleep in my bed was adam, so whenever i get lonely and sad i go and lay there and cry. wow. tmi i know. i'll probz update in 5 seconds because this brochure is shit anyway. luvz.
michelle.

I'm so so hungry right now. beyond hungry. what's making me more hungry is that michelle is talking to me about when she and nate are going to bring me food. thank the lord I have lunch break in 15 min.
so last night sam needed help with his chemistry. His final is today, and apparently his teacher has taught him nothing. I felt like I was bashing my head repeatedly against Ronnie's giant chem text books. Well, after a 3 hour chemistry lecture and me wanting to yank every hair, tooth, earring, any facial feature capable of being yanked vigorously from my skin, Sam calmly stated "well everybody is going to fail anyway." great. well maybe he'll get a C or something with my desperate attempt to redeem myself for the sake of Ronnie and the beloved Mrs. Gramlich (note the picture in the corner). anyway, goodluck sam

the land of port.

okay for someone who doesnt sleep at night, the fact that i had to wake up at 6 to get my mother to portland for a surgical consult for her broken ankle is not okay. i hate coffee, but out of necessity i drank 3 cappuccinos and im still comatose. so now the deal is that because i woke up and drove her ass here, we get to go shopping and she buys me shit. just ran into jack keenan, weird. having all these violin blasts from the past recently. im so excited about mare and my wedding. there will be glitter EVERYWHERE!!!! and a bubble machine. mom is telling the doctor that she broke her ankle skydiving. good plan. ps.we need a better pic of nate and i, because i refuse to have ryan on our blog page. also, question, why does EVERY SINGLE doctors office in america have highlights for kids magazine? even in gerontology places. and a parenting mag. im standing directly under a sign that says "kindly refrain from cell phone use", using my cell phone. oops. this coffee shit is making me want to vomit. and pee. whatever.

Pictures as promised!

Here are the pictures. If you haven't already stalked us via fb, here you go. Go crazy

Oh yes, the lovely wedding. The lovely bride and groom. In all of Kenzie's efforts, the cake eating was disappointingly clean.


There were lots and lots of bubbles. A lot of blowing bubbles out of the car. We got a few dirty looks, one in particular from some negative nancy in a green pick up. Can't handle a bit of clean fun little lade?
And the pointless scheming continued. Poor Nate got a dozen or so nerf bullets in the flank. awww ouchie. so did the mulch
My lover ended up in stilettos. Figures.

Mmm twas a splendid evening
(I don't reallly have anything else to say...)
And of course, we were blogging all the while.

A picture from the past to whet your appetite...or 2, or 3

Ahh, the future married couples




...plus Ryan





I just couldn't resist

It's going to be a ballin time

Phlebologists-study veins, apparently there are only 400 or something. thought that was appropriate.

well today has been sufficiently boring. absolutely nothing exciting has happened. We had to pick up a few placentas this morning, which is not exciting in any way to me, but perhaps you'll find that interesting. I also paid a visit to the father of the future best man for my wedding (when Dan Lesser and I get married, I'm assuming Nikolai will be the best man since they're bffls). If we didn't mention it before, Michelle is marrying Nate because she's obsessed with him, and I'm marrying Dan because I want to be her sister. Dan's a f*&@ing amazing guy too, but that totes comes second to having michelle as a sister. I don't have a sister. That'll be interesting. I'm pretty glad I don't have a sister, because there's nobody stealing my clothes, boyfriends, and status as the only fertile woman in the house, dogs included. anyway, when we all get married, it will be glorious. Dan and I will have the athletic, cellist children, and nate and michelle will have the nerdy, bigboobed children, and they'll all be bffls. Nikolai (see image below) will live with us too. ballin


oh yes wedding colors...another thing to think about on this exceptionally boring day. woody says I look good in blue and purple, so I guess we'll go with that. I also told Michelle my bridesmaid dresses will be blue, so it will be impossible to clash with them (mother's dresses, scarves, socks etc.). blue and purple. perfect. I think Michelle's should just be bright red. everything red and bold and bright and just so much *POW*. perhaps some black too. like devil colors. I look good in red. so my maid of honor dress will be smokin. the children can dress up like little demon things and throw black things around--like 70% cocoa dark chocolate and burnt toast. Lady gaga I'm sure also is smokin in red. perhaps we are soul sisters in color schemes--again a literally rockin' sister that doesn't live with me. ballin. then michelle in her white dress would just stand out like Rob Dyrdek's dog in a room full of black and red-dyed white standard poodles. so perfect. it'll just be too hot too handle. we'll probably all end up naked. great. ok. I'm going to go work on my powerpoint about the herp now. great.


ps. pictures of wedding/pre-july 4th event soon to come. perhaps this evening

This should be "Let me blog that".

Ohhhh Mondays.

I have nothing to say. my life is a constant state of boring. I have to create a brochure for my work, but i'm extremely uncreative right now. yes uncreative is now a word. maybe i'll put it on the brochure. my computer is effed up right now, which makes me extremely angry, so i have stolen my mothers. so two nights ago, maren and i decided the night was not over when the wedding finished. so we went to target and bought:

-one american flag bike bell

-2 glitter uncle sam top hats

-2 imitation nerf guns

-one pair of tug boat slippers

and then we launched an attack on the Lesser family. pictures soon to come, if we can figure out how to post them. theeen we went to dennys and had obviously the healthiest food ever. then yesterday, i slept. and worked. and then slept some more. that is how my life goes. without maren, it is boring and boring and then more boring. sigh. must get together with nate and make food for mare. that will unboring my life. love.

michelle.

we are thinking about ordering a pizza this dinner is taking so long.

michelle and i are at the wedding reception sitting with sam and paulina. hellz yeah. he keeps saying "maren youre doing so well!!!! good girl!!! but michelle... youre wasting your life. youre getting old. your biological clock is ticking. Fml. nonetheless we have been discussing our wedding plans sans grooms. michelle has decided she doesn't want any stuffy church wedding. she wants to walk down the aisle too lady gaga particularly lovegame. with a big screen up by the altar area with old greg playing in the backround. mackenzies dress is okay i guess. aliza says it looks like a prom dress. i wholeheartedly agree. maren thinks its mean of us to say that but whatever. and sam is pissed its not an open bar. and maren and i are pissed theyre carding. now we're watching a slide show of mackenzie and chris when they were little.highly entertaining. longest slide show evar. there were twenty thousand pics of mackenzie with chris's family but none with chris with kenz'z family. sam is yelling at me to put my phone down. updates when hes not looking.

piggys.

adam has piggys running around pooping in his mouth. his breath is just that bad. and he got a haircut and now he looks like a 5 year old so i REALLY look like a pedophile. great. mackenzie's wedding today. mare, wouldnt it be cute if we all wore black dresses and peach colored scarves? because of the peach colored flowers that the bridesmaids are holding. maybe i'll drag adam out to find some. love you. adam thinks he should be in playgirl. and then i laughed.
-michelle

Flight of the Conchords and embarrassment

This was just playing on my kitchen stereo system: "Does the cold of deep space make your nipples go pointy? Do you use your pointy nipples as telescopic antennea to transmit data back to earth?"

Embarrasment: When I go rollerskiing I listen to really trashy music. And when I'm going downhill and don't really have to do anything, I like to rock out to my trashy music, but only if there are no cars around. Well twice this morning, I was rocking out hard core and TWICE there were cars slowing down behind me, watching me. great.

My god, it works.

Okay, so it took maren and I an entire day to try and figure out how to post from my phone. we tried everything and within two seconds, aliza posted within two seconds. stupid whore. but then she taught me how to do it so now, instead of being a stupid whore, she is a brilliant, lovely, wonderful, fantastic, beautiful saint. okay, so this morning, in fact, 30 seconds ago, my mother and kate got in a tiff about how messy the house was. so one of them suggested that we burn some sage and say a prayer to the goddess. yeah. this actually happened. the hippyness in this house is overwhelming me. the second kate burned the sage, (walking around the house with it so that it's spiritual quality spread through the house), the dogs started sneezing and coughing and throwing a fit. then we all held hands (i was blogging with my other hand) and they "OMMMMMed". all of a sudden, kipper started omming in the EXACT same tone as mum and kate were. i was cracking up and broke the goddess prayer or whatever the fuck they were doing. i love kipper. so now that i know how to blog from my phone, there will be a lot more boring ass blogs. MARRRE!!! YOU READY FOR THIS WEDDING?!?!?!?!?!?!? a NOT to do list when planning a wedding to follow soon.
-michelle

i hate my phone.

my phone doesn't post blogs for me. just aliza and maren. hate.

aliza

aliza is amazing.

michelle s phone is learning how to post blogs

I saw a dead guy this morning

Firstly, the good news, I now have a new cello! name suggestions are much appreciated. For slightly worse, creepy news, I watched an autopsy this morning. I got to wear an all baby blue suit that looks like a moon suit. It was pretty sweet. That pretty much was the end of the sweetness, with the exception of a few highlights. Highlights would be me getting to hold a brain and not passing out. Everything else was rather traumatizing. The smell was terrible, along with the bone-sawing, torso cutting, and organ slicing (looked a lot like cutting up steak. won't be eating red meat for a while). There was also the fear of "rigor." Donna, my "boss," was talking about how she's been hit by bodies and heard them groan, because neurons are still working right after death, so things still move. pretty freaky. Too bad I wasn't wearing my heartrate monitor, because I was probably in VO2 max the whole time. The procedure also took a good 3-4 hours, so there was a lot of back and knee pain--like old people. Nonetheless, after tearing out, cutting up, and analyzing all sorts of body parts, we didn't find any cause of death, which was weird, since he was infact dead. We'll leave that for other, smarter people to decide. So now that I've gotten all that out, the day is young! get ready for the wedding rehearsal of a lifetime, michelle! I'm so glad you're sleeping with me tonight, because I'm freaked the f*&@ out. much love

so now that we have remembered what our password is, even though we made it up only 7hrs ago, I can update you on our lives, from 7 hours ago

so
Nate
Michelle
Maren
Go To Up, Fall In Love With It. . . Not Each Other, Perhaps Slightly/I LOVE KEVIN (wow that's hard to do...I give up) anyway. We have now acquired 1 tramp stamp, 1 skanky boob tattoo, the original Appalachia Waltz music which Aliza will have to read viola clef off of (smiley face), smudged mascara from crying, and 2 solutions for getting a phlebotomy chair to Stockton Springs in a small car--strap it to the top, and I don't remember the other one. I'm sorry if this post is somewhat incoherent, for it is late, and I have to go rollerskiing at the butt crack of dawn tomorrow (warning: that is not appropriate for a child[ren's movie]) so goodnight all. much love. and Michelle I hope you're reading this at home, meaning you got home safe and sound :)

First Blog

First Blog ever. hum dumdum. tuxedos are apparently a girls best friend? Rules to live by...
1) don't carry salsa covered chips over your laptop
2) don't bullet
3) don't get your nose pierced. It hurts. Contrary to Rory's memory
4) be naan
5) be nonchalant. always
6) go back to third grad spelling
7) never invite nate to dinner if said dinner is already in the oven. he'll never get there in time.
8) true dat. you can't say that to your own statement
9)dont pick at your nose ring in public. people think you're picking your nose... even if you are actually picking your nose under the guise that you're picking at your nose ring.
10) that's another reason not to get your nosepierced

ok now that that's established, this will be the best blog ever. ever. true dat. read it bisemidaily

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compliments of nan